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Author Topic: The top 100 list of outrageous things causing CCD  (Read 8152 times)
MrILoveTheAnts
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« on: April 15, 2007, 07:02:18 PM »

I've herd everything from, diseases to cell phones causing CCD. And every news article I've read seems to reference to some scientist (usually from Europe) who did something to some bees and then CCD occurred.

So I've decided to start a list of 100 outrageous things that could also cause CCD. It's not complete so feel free to add.

1) The launch of Windows Vista.

2) 7 years of George Bush in office.

3) Bees searching for Non-smoking section of the world.

4) Sanjaya's singing voice on American Idol.

5) The death of Anna Nicole Smith.
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nepenthes
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« Reply #1 on: April 15, 2007, 07:05:46 PM »

6) Carnivorous plants
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« Reply #2 on: April 15, 2007, 07:12:28 PM »

7) Internet pornography.
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MrILoveTheAnts
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« Reply #3 on: April 15, 2007, 07:47:39 PM »

8 ) The Nintendo Wii.

9) Cigarettes.

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AllanJ
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« Reply #4 on: April 15, 2007, 07:58:21 PM »

10)  CCD started to occur when the workers created a union.
« Last Edit: April 15, 2007, 09:51:07 PM by AllanJ » Logged
MrILoveTheAnts
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« Reply #5 on: April 15, 2007, 07:59:23 PM »

11) Canadian Super Villeins join forces and have unleashed their "Bee Magnet" upon the world. Soon they will destroy us all.

12) Bees cash in their frequent flier miles and vacation in the Bahamas.

13) Dog Chromosomes manage their way into the Honey Bee Genome. Workers cannot stop flying in circles, while trying to catch their stinger.
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Understudy
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« Reply #6 on: April 15, 2007, 09:23:03 PM »

14) activist judges

15) Aliens from Mars

16) Viagria
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« Reply #7 on: April 15, 2007, 09:35:37 PM »

17) people who like Matt Kenseth in Nascar (like the all powerful Beemaster whom picks his nose daily)
18) gas prices

19) the ps3
« Last Edit: April 17, 2007, 05:20:21 PM by buzzbeejr » Logged

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MrILoveTheAnts
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« Reply #8 on: April 15, 2007, 10:12:49 PM »

20 ) Hords of flesh-eating zombies trying to relieve the pain of undead arthritis.

21) The Mile High club... I think we all know why.
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Jerrymac
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« Reply #9 on: April 16, 2007, 05:58:43 AM »

22. They heard those dumb blond jokes and became dumb blonds.

23. That satellite the Chinese destroyed was their GPS locater.

24. They don't call it loco weed for nothin'.

25. They heard Cyndi Lauper singing about how girls just want to have fun.

 
« Last Edit: April 16, 2007, 09:43:55 AM by Jerrymac » Logged

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« Reply #10 on: April 16, 2007, 02:32:25 PM »

26) All Bees abscouned to Jerrymac's fortified Bunker after the arrival of the 6000 gallon tanker of queen pheromone.

27) Kathyp's logical and wellspoken Conservative thinking changed these Social Creatures to Capitolists, they now reside in the lower-levels of Wall Street waiting to buy all pollinated fruit and veggie stocks BEFORE the inevitable market climb occurs.

28) Buzzbeejr found 1 billion miniture Axis Power uniforms, supplying all the bees he could with them. After finding out his effort to make a fair game of Enemy Territory had gone all wrong, he turned his weapons on his team mates in a futile game of Civil War.

29) A distant planet from Earth needed honeybees in order to pollinate their crops after the buzzerpooh insect went extinct due to the dreaded cyclical Global Cooling - they sent their entire fleet of motherships to Earth and transmitted their massive pheromone waves, all workerbee (and those lazy drones) flew up to the low hovering ships and within minutes the air-craft was well on its way back to its own Galaxy.

PS - Thanks Jerry
« Last Edit: April 17, 2007, 07:44:15 AM by beemaster » Logged

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MrILoveTheAnts
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« Reply #11 on: April 16, 2007, 09:28:15 PM »

30) A terrorist honey bee sleeper cell of suicide stingers was activated. 
« Last Edit: April 17, 2007, 07:43:34 AM by beemaster » Logged

nepenthes
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« Reply #12 on: April 17, 2007, 10:15:28 PM »

31) The Initiative on Cybernations.com  hahhaa
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« Reply #13 on: April 19, 2007, 08:17:40 AM »

 
32) They heard that Al sharpton and Jessie Jackson were coming to fight for their cause

33) Its five o'clock somewhere.Happy hour and all you can eat buffet.(can clear an office pretty quick too!) cheesy cheesy cheesy
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« Reply #14 on: April 20, 2007, 04:14:58 PM »

(34) they joined the army reserve trying to bee all that they can bee
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MrILoveTheAnts
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« Reply #15 on: April 20, 2007, 07:09:45 PM »

36) The Honey Bee internal GPS system gets its directions from Map Quest now.
« Last Edit: April 21, 2007, 09:30:55 AM by MrILoveTheAnts » Logged

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« Reply #16 on: April 21, 2007, 08:25:06 AM »

37)  Cingular is the NEW AT&T.
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Brian D. Bray
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« Reply #17 on: April 21, 2007, 06:49:04 PM »

38) The UCLA as decide to list bees as underpriviledged and represent them. 
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« Reply #18 on: April 21, 2007, 08:54:53 PM »

39)  Unlike the humans, they actually listened to the dolphins and are leaving earth before the vogon destructor ship arrives..
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« Reply #19 on: April 21, 2007, 09:07:01 PM »

40) They received a voice message from Alec Baldwin  grin
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buzzbeejr
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« Reply #20 on: April 21, 2007, 09:23:08 PM »

41) someone accidentally put dope in the smoker instead of normal smoker fuels.
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MrILoveTheAnts
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« Reply #21 on: April 28, 2007, 04:01:53 PM »

42) http://members.shaw.ca/ahtenaga/shoes.html Athletes Foot.

43) Attempting to understand modern art. http://members.shaw.ca/ahtenaga/home.html
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MrILoveTheAnts
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« Reply #22 on: May 04, 2007, 06:45:40 PM »

Lots of reasons here.

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=2454933
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« Reply #23 on: May 05, 2007, 11:36:46 PM »

45 (I think)

By befriending the yellowjack, the honeybee has moved underground where NO ONE would ever expect to look.

46) The Mothership collected them all, dropped them off in FRANCH and the poor things all committed suiside.

47) Some "not to bright worker" got sold on Amway products, now they all are going door to door JUST to break even.

48) After getting caught at a drive-in movie one night, they all saw the movie SAW III and are scared to return to dark places.

49) They heard of a rumor that God is starting a new Garden of Eden and thought the trip was well worth the effort concidaring man has turned them into a modified ant-farm and they no longer feel like real bees.

50) Because of record increases of sunspot activity, the bees are spending an extra hour a day in the field, only to be lost and stuck there at night - consequently, the BAT POPULATION in 2007 has doubled world wide and expected to continue to rise until no bees are left or  DAY LIGHT SAVINGS TIME is done away with!!!!!!
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« Reply #24 on: May 06, 2007, 09:00:31 AM »

51) verizon's new family plan.
52) the new motorola razr.
52) the price of gas keeps bees from returning home from the fields.
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« Reply #25 on: May 06, 2007, 12:28:08 PM »

53) Istanbul is Constantinople now
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« Reply #26 on: May 13, 2007, 02:53:17 AM »

54) The bees heard Rosie ODonnell is going to become beekeeper (look how she destroyed K-Mart!)

55) [Broke Back Mountain would only kill all the drones...]

56) Trump and Sue Bee have hired a mob to ruin beekeeping because the apprentice beekeeping show didn't get the ratings expected.

57) High Tension Power Lines (competing buzz)

58) The magnetic poles are about to flip, they're partying in antartica

59) Arial Chem-Trails

60) Hey, I don't like the looks of the 2008 election either, I'm considering leaving the country too!

61) How do you think the Aussie get all their bees for cheap packages anyway? (kidnapping?)

62) The bees are all on location filming the fall "B movie"

63) The newspaper's frequent misspelling of "fowlbrood" has made the bees migrate on their own.

64) Bee extras need for the next Bush's Honey Beens advertisement.

65) There's a giant beehive following the Hale Bop Comet, put on your bee sneakers and don't be afraid to eat the apple sauce.

66) Tom Cruise is doing some freaky stuff, maybe he's doing something with the bees?

67) Interest rates must be on the rise, I think we are having a hiving bust.

68) KFC no trans-fat, maybe the bees are at a consortum to work out the "honey sauce" thing next?

69) Al-queda is posing as beekeepers and destroying world pollination.

70) Bees all got a copy of Forest Gump and decided to start flying and just keep on flying....

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« Reply #27 on: May 13, 2007, 06:03:04 AM »

71.)  There is a severe distortion in the Torsion Flux matrix...
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« Reply #28 on: May 27, 2007, 08:11:15 AM »

72)They played to much Enemy Territory and got Elbow Tendonites, so they couldn't continue flying , right John grin
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« Reply #29 on: May 27, 2007, 02:00:16 PM »

73) Dale Jr. may leave DEI
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« Reply #30 on: May 30, 2007, 09:38:33 PM »

78) Wikipedia!
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« Reply #31 on: June 14, 2007, 03:56:19 PM »

What happened to 74 through 77?
Lost in space where acid rain caught up with them.
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« Reply #32 on: July 01, 2007, 10:11:45 PM »

(74) I heard that God decided that the bees were more worthy of the rapture than we humans were.
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« Reply #33 on: July 22, 2007, 12:00:39 AM »

75)  Must be something in the water

76)  It's all the vitamins they have now a days.  They're growing up way too
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« Reply #34 on: September 26, 2007, 10:29:20 PM »

77) Global Warming rolleyes
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« Reply #35 on: September 27, 2007, 02:03:02 PM »

Why without question , it has to be Shakespeare's "Hamlet" .  You know  "To bee or not to bee ---"                            ---Burl---
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« Reply #36 on: September 28, 2007, 12:44:23 PM »

Or was that correctly 'MacBeth' ?  "Oh to suffer the outrageous slings and arrows of fortune. "
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« Reply #37 on: October 13, 2007, 08:23:59 AM »

(79) They heard Hilary's laugh

(80) Al Gore won the noble peace prize

(81) They became liberal and decided to quit working for the man

(82) Too many illegal mexicans to deal with
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