Welcome, Guest

Author Topic: Dead crows  (Read 930 times)

Offline iddee

  • Galactic Bee
  • ******
  • Posts: 7704
  • Gender: Male
Dead crows
« on: August 26, 2013, 08:28:31 PM »
Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, it was confirmed that the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu.

The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts. However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car. MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.

The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger. The conclusion was that while all the lookout crows could say "Cah", none could say "Truck."

That, my friend, is the best piece of knowledge I will be passing out today.
"Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me . . . Anything can happen, child. Anything can be"

*Shel Silverstein*

Offline itsme

  • House Bee
  • **
  • Posts: 108
  • Gender: Male
Re: Dead crows
« Reply #1 on: August 26, 2013, 11:54:37 PM »
I have seen much better jokes and for some reason I really, really like dumb corny ones like this one ;-)

Online sawdstmakr

  • Galactic Bee
  • ******
  • Posts: 6882
  • Gender: Male
Re: Dead crows
« Reply #2 on: August 27, 2013, 12:08:36 AM »
"If you don't read the newspaper you are uninformed.  If you do read the newspaper you are misinformed."--Mark Twain

Offline edward

  • Queen Bee
  • ****
  • Posts: 1203
  • Gender: Male
Re: Dead crows
« Reply #3 on: August 27, 2013, 05:14:24 AM »
 :-D hahahahahaha

Offline tefer2

  • Super Bee
  • *****
  • Posts: 2318
  • Gender: Male
Re: Dead crows
« Reply #4 on: August 27, 2013, 09:16:37 AM »

Offline Geoff

  • Field Bee
  • ***
  • Posts: 731
  • Gender: Male
Re: Dead crows
« Reply #5 on: August 28, 2013, 06:56:33 PM »
  Claude the crow seems to be everywhere. First sighted him in Calgary, Alberta then somewhere in Massachusetts. Mr Crow has now taken up Australian citizenship so will probably be popping up on the Nullabor, Ayres Rock, the Harbour Bridge or St Kilda Road Melbourne. He has already made his acquaintence with some of my family and friends.   Thanks Jim 134.
Local Area Network in Australia - the LAN down under.