Bee Happy
Super Bee
   
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Location: Between Panama city, Florida and Dothan Al.
that's me - setting a phoenix free
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« on: February 01, 2011, 12:23:05 PM » |
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It seems that almost any joke can find it's way into offending someone, whether it's a little or a lot; because the components for "Joke"usually mean that someone is surprised/duped/shocked - and someone else surprises/wins/shocks. The solution has been in front of us for millennia - Jokes which include human beings are GOING to offend someone to some degree. Given the recently invented "right not to be offended" the solution must be implemented forthwith - post haste - ex post juris nauseam - ad vomitora: All Jokes shall now be required to replace as their characters, BLOCKS OF WOOD and ROCKS. Sincerely - me.
...So this chunk of Mexican Ironwood and 2 chunks of Iraqi sandstone are in an Irish bar hitting on some Georgia Peachwood from a trailer park when a flake of San Francisco tiger's eye rolls in...
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be happy and make others happy.
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kathyp
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« Reply #1 on: February 01, 2011, 12:37:19 PM » |
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"Nay, it [this constitution of government] must perish, if there be not that vital spirit in the people, which alone can nourish, sustain, and direct all its movements. It is in vain, that statesmen shall form plans of government, in which the beauty and harmony of a republic shall be embodied in visible order, shall be built up on solid substructions, and adorned by every useful ornament, if the inhabitants suffer the silent power of time to dilapidate its walls, or crumble its massy supporters into dust; if the assaults from without are never resisted, and the rottenness and mining from within are never guarded against. Who can preserve the rights and liberties of the people, when they shall be abandoned by themselves? Who shall keep watch in the temple, when the watchmen sleep at their posts? Who shall call upon the people to redeem their possessions, and revive the republic, when their own hands have deliberately and corruptly surrendered them to the oppressor, and have built the prisons, or dug the graves of their own friends?
– Justice Joseph Story, "Commentaries on the Constitution of the United States," Volume II, Chapter XIII: Mode of Passing Laws, Sections 900-901, pp. 364 (1833)
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hardwood
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« Reply #2 on: February 01, 2011, 12:39:28 PM » |
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"In the first place, we should insist that if the immigrant who comes here in good faith becomes an American and assimilates himself to us, he shall be treated on an exact equality with everyone else, for it is an outrage to discriminate against any such man because of creed, or birthplace, or origin. But this is predicated upon the person's becoming in every facet an American, and nothing but an American...There can be no divided allegiance here. Any man who says he is an American, but something else also, isn't an American at all. We have room for but one flag, the American flag...We have room for but one language here, and that is the English language...And we have room for but one sole loyalty and that is a loyalty to the American people."
Theodore Roosevelt 1907
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AllenF
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« Reply #3 on: February 01, 2011, 01:54:19 PM » |
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iddee
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« Reply #4 on: February 01, 2011, 02:47:14 PM » |
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"Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me . . . Anything can happen, child. Anything can be"
*Shel Silverstein*
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iddee
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« Reply #5 on: February 01, 2011, 02:50:48 PM » |
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I think if your goal is to sanitize jokes,
You are in polluted purgatory without a proper means of location.
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"Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me . . . Anything can happen, child. Anything can be"
*Shel Silverstein*
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Irwin
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Location: Lakeside OR
howdy all
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« Reply #6 on: February 01, 2011, 04:12:20 PM » |
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I think if your goal is to sanitize jokes,
You are in polluted purgatory without a proper means of location.
LMAO 
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Fight organized crime! Re-elect no one.
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Bee Happy
Super Bee
   
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Gender: 
Posts: 1643
Location: Between Panama city, Florida and Dothan Al.
that's me - setting a phoenix free
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« Reply #7 on: February 01, 2011, 05:00:22 PM » |
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I think if your goal is to sanitize jokes,
You are in polluted purgatory without a proper means of location.
I forgot to include some degree of misdirection as a setup element in most jokes too. 
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be happy and make others happy.
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Jerrymac
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« Reply #8 on: February 02, 2011, 11:55:18 AM » |
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I did a joke about spiders and it ended up with five pages of bickering 
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bull
House Bee

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Location: Chanute Ks.
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« Reply #9 on: February 02, 2011, 05:07:46 PM » |
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its just that time of year, ive had my head bit off everwhere ive been. 
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starbits
New Bee
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Location: Hopelessly Lost
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« Reply #10 on: March 26, 2011, 11:47:21 PM » |
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Since there are no longer any Hittites jokes about them should offend no one.
So there were these two Hittites, Ole and Lena....
Starbits
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