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Author Topic: A girl and two spiders  (Read 7169 times)
Jerrymac
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« on: January 08, 2011, 06:22:21 PM »


A father watched his young daughter playing in the garden.
He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and pure his little girl was.
Tears formed in his eyes as he thought about her seeing the wonders of  nature through such innocent eyes.
Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground.
He went over to her to see what work of God had captured her attention.
He noticed she was looking at two spiders mating.

'Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?' she asked.

'They're mating,' her father replied.

'What do you call the spider on top?' she asked.

'A Daddy Longlegs,' her father answered.

'So, the other one is a Mommy Longlegs?' the little girl asked.

As his heart soared with the joy of such a cute and innocent question he replied, 'No dear. Both of them are Daddy Longlegs.'

'The little girl, looking a little puzzled, thought for a moment, then lifted her foot and stomped them flat.

'Well", she said, "that may be OK in California , but we're not having any of that stuff in Texas!"
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« Reply #1 on: January 08, 2011, 07:56:33 PM »

 grin grin grin cheer
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AllenF
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« Reply #2 on: January 08, 2011, 09:14:50 PM »

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Bee Happy
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« Reply #3 on: January 08, 2011, 11:36:12 PM »

 lau
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BjornBee
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« Reply #4 on: January 09, 2011, 08:34:43 AM »

I rank this with the one about screwing your appliance (the wife) on the bed.

And that's not saying much.

Is this a funny humorous story, or a thread indicating personal preference, political, religious, or a moral position?

I just don't get why these things are allowed on a bee forum.

It's a story about the teaching of a little girl, to be mean and vindictive towards another group of folks.

Sorry, whether it's masked as a funny or not, I don't get why someone would post this on an open forum. I just don't get the humor in this, the message, or the appropriateness.
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Bee Happy
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« Reply #5 on: January 09, 2011, 08:54:05 AM »

You know, I was mortified the day my sweet innocent boy came home and said "I don't like black people" - I think he was about six, and maybe had a rough day - who knows where kids come up with half the stuff they do but being outraged because it can be shocking and thereby funny seems a waste of indignation. (I had to, of course, untangle the boy's conclusion based on his dealings with a couple rotten kids - but then you could conclude that because my young child formed an opinion I certainly didn't share all by his little lonesome that I was some kind of monster and spent evenings reading him the picture edition of "mein Kampf" before he could walk.)  I just feel terribly lucky he didn't decide to blurt that in the middle of the mall.
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Jerrymac
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« Reply #6 on: January 09, 2011, 09:57:29 AM »

OK to balance it out.... From the movie full metal jacket....

Opps. Well I was going to post a segment from that movie but the language is really rough. Just go to Utube and search

"Texas: Only Steers and Queers"

People are too sensitive these days.  rolleyes Did you hear they are taking the "N" word out of Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn books? Once considered great literature. Recommended reading in schools. 

Also the questioning of being allowed on a bee forum. This is the  "HUMOR is a FUNNY THING" section. Not the  "HUMOR is a FUNNY THING as long as it is bee jokes" section.
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BjornBee
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« Reply #7 on: January 09, 2011, 10:22:38 AM »

OK to balance it out.... From the movie full metal jacket....

So your suggesting if it's in a movie it's fair game? What's next, humorous stories about stringing up a gay man to a fence or dragging blacks behind cars? Both of which are in movies.

Opps. Well I was going to post a segment from that movie but the language is really rough. Just go to Utube and search

"Texas: Only Steers and Queers"


Yep, I agree, lots of rough stuff out there. I'm just wondering why it needs to come here. Maybe not the language, but certainly why the message.


People are too sensitive these days.  rolleyes Did you hear they are taking the "N" word out of Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn books? Once considered great literature. Recommended reading in schools.  

I agree. Leave the book alone. But I also wonder why those that hear others with differing opinions need to rationalize, and bring other issues into it. Respecting other people's opinion is also about not trying to bash them or rationalizing other people's opinions by pointing fingers and claiming people are too sensitive. If you are not, fine. I didn't suggest removing this thread. Just adding my opinion to it.

Also the questioning of being allowed on a bee forum. This is the  "HUMOR is a FUNNY THING" section. Not the  "HUMOR is a FUNNY THING as long as it is bee jokes" section.

Never said it should be removed. I questioned why it is here. I never suggested jokes should be only about bees. I do however question the denigration of any other group, including Native Americans, women, blacks, gays, etc., disguised as humor...then weakly supported by references to movies.

Hey, don't get upset. I'm just expressing my opinion just as those who laughed at a story filled with symbolism of squashing two gay spiders.  Wink This was what it was about...Right?

There is lots of funny stuff out there. I just don't think these are funny. And I hope on any forum, that the members can appreciate a differing of opinion.  grin

I love how we can't say ni---- or fag---, but if we disquise our feelings on the matter, we can make funnies and still get our points across, just becuase some call it humor. Sorry...that's the way I see it.
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iddee
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« Reply #8 on: January 09, 2011, 10:36:16 AM »

Tolerance..Tolerance..Tolerance..

Why do the ones that bleat it out every other sentence have none of it for us old timers who don't like diversity, still think ethical separation is good, and still enjoy off color jokes. They forget the word Tolerance real quick when it comes to us.
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« Reply #9 on: January 09, 2011, 10:47:26 AM »

Tolerance..Tolerance..Tolerance..

Why do the ones that bleat it out every other sentence have none of it for us old timers who don't like diversity, still think ethical separation is good, and still enjoy off color jokes. They forget the word Tolerance real quick when it comes to us.
Well said Wink
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JP
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« Reply #10 on: January 09, 2011, 10:56:12 AM »

What happened to the days where on a bee forum it was alright to have as your signature "Marking queens is gay!"

I guess the times are changin'!  lau


...JP
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Jerrymac
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« Reply #11 on: January 09, 2011, 10:58:31 AM »

But I also wonder why those that hear others with differing opinions need to rationalize, and bring other issues into it. Respecting other people's opinion is also about not trying to bash them or rationalizing other people's opinions by pointing fingers and claiming people are too sensitive. If you are not, fine. I didn't suggest removing this thread. Just adding my opinion to it.


So you can bash me for posting it but I can't bash you for bashing me? Got it.  Wink


I never suggested jokes should be only about bees. I do however question the denigration of any other group, including Native Americans, women, blacks, gays, etc., disguised as humor...


Did you hear the one about the Priest, the Rabbi....... Oh sorry can't do that one.

How about that Aggie..... opps! another group.

Know what the Eskimos.... Sorry.

Those Southerners...... OK I am going to find one here soon that I can tell.

This Irish dude.... Nope.

Did you hear about the Pollock that tripped.... Another one bites the dust

There was this Cowboy.... DARN IT!!!!

This beekeeper..... 

A CNN reporter....

This Congressman...

Canadians.....

So this redneck....

How about a hillbilly that.....

Drill Sergeant Therapist
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BjornBee
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« Reply #12 on: January 09, 2011, 11:08:07 AM »

Your claiming I bashed you, and your suggesting I'm the sensitive one.  shocked

This is the humor board afterall...  Wink

Most overly-defensive people claim bashing..........


Love that commercial. I'm probably just like gunny in many ways. Of course I never heard him bash gays, blacks, women, etc.  grin

JP....that "marking queens is gay" was put on my signature by an unknown moderator. Kind of a joke. Some I'm sure could of found it to mean "marking queens is fun". However I'm sure the homophobes, bigots, and others would of automatically seen it as bashing gays. It was not. 
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BjornBee
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« Reply #13 on: January 09, 2011, 11:16:54 AM »

Tolerance..Tolerance..Tolerance..

Why do the ones that bleat it out every other sentence have none of it for us old timers who don't like diversity, still think ethical separation is good, and still enjoy off color jokes. They forget the word Tolerance real quick when it comes to us.

Typical response.

Sorry iddee. I'm sure you still use such dialog as "there's a nig--- in that woodpile", and get a chuckle out of it. I'm just questioning why it needs to be on a forum. I'm not asking anyone to be tolerant. I'm just questioning some of the (many by you) jokes that are posted here. This is a forum...right? I can tell you whether it's funny or not...right?

Expressions agianst diversity, ethical separation, and telling off-color jokes, may be more suited around the fire at night amongst friends. Sorry if you don't see the difference between that and a forum. Maybe that is why your a "old-timer".....  Wink
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« Reply #14 on: January 09, 2011, 11:24:47 AM »

St. Bjorn. Patron Saint of Gay Spiders  grin
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Jerrymac
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« Reply #15 on: January 09, 2011, 11:26:47 AM »

Your claiming I bashed you, and your suggesting I'm the sensitive one.  shocked

Just my opinion as other things were your opinion.


Most overly-defensive people claim bashing..........

You claimed bashing first  Wink


However I'm sure the homophobes, bigots, and others would of automatically seen it as bashing gays.

Again, someones opinion. One opinion is just as good as another if not equally better.  grin
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« Reply #16 on: January 09, 2011, 11:28:54 AM »

Possible side effect of telling jokes may include anal leakage.
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JP
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« Reply #17 on: January 09, 2011, 11:34:10 AM »

 Quote from Bjorn "JP....that "marking queens is gay" was put on my signature by an unknown moderator. Kind of a joke. Some I'm sure could of found it to mean "marking queens is fun". However I'm sure the homophobes, bigots, and others would of automatically seen it as bashing gays. It was not."

Oh, Ok, I certainly didn't think it meant anything other than you were gay friendly or that you felt a little gay when marking queens as in having fun while marking queens.

Hey, if someone wants to where a pink little dress, dancing around while marking queens, that's fine by me. As long as beekeeping is being promoted in a positive way.

 
Hey, bring back the signature, now that the air has been cleared about it.


...JP
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Jerrymac
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« Reply #18 on: January 09, 2011, 11:39:26 AM »

Masculine man wearing dainty sissy pink tutu in public
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« Reply #19 on: January 09, 2011, 11:40:05 AM »


Again, someones opinion. One opinion is just as good as another if not equally better.  grin

True.

I'm not questioning that. I do however question when a person has the opinion (or portrayed through so-called humorous jokes) that gays should be killed, blacks should be beat, wives should be punched in the mouth, ...and some feel the need to relay those opinions and beliefs through off-colored jokes, and disguised as stories on a forum.

Iddee already has stated that he should be respected for telling off colored jokes on a forum such as this. So it's more than just a funny story. It's based on a personal belief system.

My opinion is, why? Because it's funny? I happen to disagree. I'm not attacking anyone. I just do not feel the same.

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