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Author Topic: Ir was all going so well............  (Read 2634 times)
mick
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« on: November 07, 2009, 11:05:36 PM »

a beautiful spring day to get into the 4 deep hive, make some room, take out some honey. I had cleaned up some frames and fitted foundation, went outside, put my tools on a chair, an upside lid, a spare box. I had a lil trouble sustaining smoke, but nothing unusual.

All went as well as it could, given that this is a evil nasty dreadful hive, always has been, the nuc from the local bee supplies was too commercial, too aggressive, but a good producer.

They started at me from the word go, hello girls, you bleep. Got the first two supers off, checked each frame, hmm so far so good all about 90% filed and capped. Getting a sting or two as I usually do with this hive.

Now I suspected the bottom two boxes to be largely brood, I levered each corner, seemed OK then as would be my downfall, liftred straight up. Unbeknown to me, I had liifted not only the 8 frames in the super at hand , but also the 8 below, straight out of the super! There they were swingng in the breeze, I didnt know, I turned and knocked over the two boxes and the frames I had taken out that were leaning against the boxes. Thousands of bees took to the air with a death warrant for me. I still had the 16 frames in my hands, being stung all over the place. I thought maybe I had one underneath and knocked it off onto the ground, then had to knock the remaing 7 off, more millions of bees,and  my smoker has gone out, I have dozens of frames on the ground. Its not looking good and sounding worse.

I manage to put down the super Ive been holding, by this time my suit has slipped, and Ive copped a couple of hundred stings. Im trying to get the smoker going and now they are stinging my balls. Ive copped a good 4 on each of the crown jewels. Im trying to smoke, run scratch my crotch, pick up and avoid fallen frames and calculate the thickness of the male scrotum when compared to the length of the sting on a bee.  Bud tells me I might get the itches at work tomorrow, sounds like fun. By this time Ive given in, Ive run into the shower fully clothed, bees hot pursuit.

Ive had to shut the back door and headed for the big white medicine cabinet tin the kitchen. It worked pretty well. I waited an hour consoled by Mr. Bud when he wasnt laughing his guts out. He told me that they would be whooped pretty good!

It took me a while to work out what whooped pretty good actually meant. I trusted Mr. Bud, another beer and out I went. As predicted they were not as bad. Im glad I threw the towell in when I did. My hands are worst, then, my face and shoulder. The Aussie Agates have held up pretty well.

I managed to clean up pretty good a full 8 frames of capped and uncapped brood. Above I put a good 8 frames of 80% capped honey. I wasnt looking for the evil queen, slammed the lid on, this one will sort itself out. One new hive, not the easy way and not my initial intention, but another hives a bonus. I think there are not enough bees in this hive, so will have to go back a third time and shake some in.

The other hive is three boxes high. top box looks like brood and honey, the other two Im not so sure about. I think its mainly honey in the bottom and a mixture in the middle. I will have to go back into this tomorrow If i can. Surprisingly my random picking up of the frames has had about 70% of them in the right order next to each other, just not in the same vertical position in the stack.

So here I sit in pain. Id say a couple of hundred stings all up. My left hand is worst, but its overall not so bad. Im lucky I am relatively tolerant of stings.

I hope I killed the queen, I stepped on enough bees thats for sure. I should have photographed my jacket, it has 500 stings in it easily, so a lot of carnage today.

I wont post any pics, because theres only one that would be interesting, and its a family forum folks!

Theres a heap of bees sooking on the outside of the hive that needs organising, they dont like me atm, they will have to wait.

If anyone should ask, it hurts for about 30 minutes. I found drinking a can of beer whilst hanging the aforementioned casualties over a second icy cold can of beer was god, it worked for me.




« Last Edit: November 10, 2009, 01:54:05 AM by mick » Logged
annette
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« Reply #1 on: November 07, 2009, 11:17:41 PM »

You can really tell a funny story Mick. How brave you were through it all and even continued to check out the other hives. It's amazing how fast things can get chaotic in a bee yard.

With that veil on, sometimes it becomes so hard to see anything and then you are moving perhaps faster than you should and things start to get in the way and oops, something falls over.  I had my smoker fall over on me this summer. Didn 't see it and kicked it over.  Yiks, you just don't do that here in dry Northern California. It was OK, no fires.

I think you have to get rid of that awful queen one of these days.

I would be in the hospital if I had gotten that many stings.

Take care
Annette



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slaphead
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« Reply #2 on: November 08, 2009, 12:15:23 AM »

Mick,

You're priceless.  If anyone ever compiles a book of bee tales this one should be in it.  God bless you mate and here's hoping for your danglies.

SH
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« Reply #3 on: November 08, 2009, 12:47:02 AM »

oh mick.  thanks for the laugh.  sorry about the stings, but at least you take them ok.  good excuse for the cold beer  grin.
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.....The greatest changes occur in their country without their cooperation. They are not even aware of precisely what has taken place. They suspect it; they have heard of the event by chance. More than that, they are unconcerned with the fortunes of their village, the safety of their streets, the fate of their church and its vestry. They think that such things have nothing to do with them, that they belong to a powerful stranger called “the government.” They enjoy these goods as tenants, without a sense of ownership, and never give a thought to how they might be improved.....

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« Reply #4 on: November 08, 2009, 06:12:56 AM »

Mick thanks for the laugh, I REALLY enjoyed that.  Lips Sealed
I'm lost for words after reading that, I just hope those girls learn their lesson not to mess with you again - I think you got the better of them, even though it might not feel like it right now. I'd like to buy you a beer right now, I'll bet you could use another one, or even two  grin  grin  grin
Cheers,
John.
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charmd2
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« Reply #5 on: November 08, 2009, 08:43:45 AM »

I had a swarm similar to that this spring.  I bet I had every bit of a hundred stings, and god knows how many my visor, and jacket had in it.   I take stings well too, but I looked really puffy for a good 24 hours.  Then it just itched, probally three or four days of intense itching.   Good luck. 
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Charla Hinkle
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« Reply #6 on: November 08, 2009, 08:53:18 AM »

That is the funniest story I have read in some time. Mine are tingling just thinking of it. If there is a worse place to get stung I can't imagine where might be.
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bud1
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« Reply #7 on: November 08, 2009, 08:58:27 AM »

youall shoulda been on ventrilla; when the agiator was telig me his story; he had me gasping.  cant wait to give Geoff the news.
Glad you got them back together Mick.  HAPPY SCRATCHING
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to bee or not to bee
kathyp
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« Reply #8 on: November 08, 2009, 11:22:14 AM »

sorry i missed that one.  i almost never get to talk to mick and i missed the best chat!
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.....The greatest changes occur in their country without their cooperation. They are not even aware of precisely what has taken place. They suspect it; they have heard of the event by chance. More than that, they are unconcerned with the fortunes of their village, the safety of their streets, the fate of their church and its vestry. They think that such things have nothing to do with them, that they belong to a powerful stranger called “the government.” They enjoy these goods as tenants, without a sense of ownership, and never give a thought to how they might be improved.....

 Alexis de Tocqueville
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« Reply #9 on: November 08, 2009, 03:43:47 PM »

   Mick you have outdone all our great writers. The Loaded Dog has been surpassed by the LOADED HIVE.

For the unknowing the Loaded Dog is an Australian yarn about a miners dog who picks up a lit stick of dynamite and takes it under the house.
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G3farms
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« Reply #10 on: November 08, 2009, 03:51:04 PM »

Mick you are very funny with that story, sorry to here of all of the stings.

Next time after you break the boxes loose at the corners, when you go to lift the top box try twisting it to break the burr comb lose.

I think I would hunt down the evil queen and behead her.

G3
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« Reply #11 on: November 08, 2009, 08:54:07 PM »

What a story Mick. I needed a good laugh today and sure got it.  grin grin grin I don't think story telling Cindi could have done it any better. Now you can write the Aussie book of beekeeping and How Not To Do It In The Bush ! Hope the next couple of days goes by quickly for you old bloke. Happy Scratching !
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mick
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« Reply #12 on: November 09, 2009, 01:59:28 AM »

Im glad yall got a good laugh, it really is the best medicine! I thought those of you I know would enjoy the tale!

What I will always remember is the adrenalin rush when I realised I had knocked over two boxes and had 16 frames in my hands and no way to put them down gently. So many options and tasks ran through my mind in a few seconds, it was like being at a car crash.

I slept OK, this morning, my third goolie had almost disappeared I tell ya boys, the third appeared after about three hours. I was kinda worried for a few secs.I didnt get the itchin Bud told me about, but he said nuttin about growing a reserve player.

My left hand is still very swollen, kinda looks like botox. No wrinkles, no veins just a very smooth plump appearance. I put this down to maybe 30 or 40 stings in a square inch during my initial rapid outflanking maneuver in the opposite direction to the enemy and later counter attacks.  I have one good lump on my jaw, quite odd, it must have been close to a gland or something, I guess, all the rest went pretty quickly. Im just very lucky I have built up a tolerance. I put that down to the time me and me mate decided to get some honey from a beehive in a stump covered with about 6 feet of blackberries with an axe when we were about 7. I must go to the doctor and get an epipen. I dont plan on repeating the events of yesterday, but if there is a next time i might not be so lucky. When I told the boss what happened, his response was "what are you doing here?" but I was not sick enough to stay home and its hard to explain to a non beekeeper how you can get stung a couple of hundred times or more and not be in hospital.

I was going to delve back in this arvo, but they are not happy with me. The left alone hive is going nicely. The newly formed 2 box hive is quiet. Bees at the entrance but no coming and going. I bet this does not have the queen in it. I might give this hive some more bees. I reckon another box on top too becasue Its got a huge amount of honey in the top box I took it from the fallen over hive.  It doesnt need any more capped brood, but maybe some eggs, I need to have a proper look, hopefully tomorrow and barge in and get some eggs from the mess if need be. Ive done a split before, so am not fazed by this hive.

Only problem might be robbing. Its 20 feet from its biological partner. They might all go back home, but I know how to deal with this.

The other hive the main one that I knocked over I couldnt get near. Its back together almost in the right order and proportions, three boxes high. I just want to get back in there and look for and kill that evil wench. It would have about 80% of the bees, the other hive 20%. I should try and make the numbers more even. Since all the bees would still smell the same, I should be able to do this tomorrow.

I forgot to add, my kidneys are sore. I dont get this pain, so maybe they had to work overtime to get rid of the poison?

Its been around 90 here the last few days and will be for the next two weeks, a really sudden start to summer in spring. Already they are talking about the hottest november on record!
« Last Edit: November 09, 2009, 02:55:10 AM by mick » Logged
SlickMick
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« Reply #13 on: November 09, 2009, 02:32:40 AM »

Mick, that's the funniest story I have read in a long time. I would have loved to see it happen, I'd still be on the floor rolling with laughter. lau

Frankly the funniest aspect of the story is imagining you sitting there after the event with the goolies hanging over a cold tinnie and listening to them sizzle  lau I have to wonder how the girls got to your agates huh

All of us on the forum should chip in some $ and get a professional outfit to make a video of it.. the only thing is you'd have to do it all over again

Mick
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On the outer Barcoo where the churches are few,
   And men of religion are scanty,
On a road never cross'd 'cept by folk that are lost,
   One Michael Magee had a shanty.

Now this Mike was the dad of a ten-year-old lad,
   Plump, healthy, and stoutly conditioned;
He was strong as the best, but poor Mike had no rest
   For the youngster had never been christened,
A BUSH CHRISTENING - A.B. "Banjo" Paterson http://www.middlemiss.org/lit/authors/patersonab/poetry/christen.html
Cindi
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« Reply #14 on: November 09, 2009, 08:10:02 AM »

Ha, Mick, oh what a hoot and a hollar, you speak so blatantly, I love that!!!  Glad to hear that you are OK actually, that is a whole lotta stings to take.  I always wonder why men are so protective of those parts way down under, smiling.  There are always so many jokes about this apparatus(es), and men always talk about when they cringe when another dude gets hurt there.  Do you guys really feel another's pain, smiling.  I must have a mean streak in me, cause when I hear of things like these that happen to men, it really makes me have a gut-rolling laugh.... evil cool Smiley Smiley Smiley.  Take care of yourself.  Have still, a great, most awesome day, with that health. Cindi
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There are strange things done in the midnight sun by the men who moil for gold.  The Arctic trails have their secret tales that would make your blood run cold.  The Northern Lights have seen queer sights, but the queerest they ever did see, what the night on the marge of Lake Lebarge, I cremated Sam McGee.  Robert Service
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« Reply #15 on: November 09, 2009, 08:36:11 AM »

I will leave this post on the TV SCREEN for when Tracey gets home. She saw my bees go JIGGY on me TWICE! I was stung where Beemaster would wear his "little helmet" because... that bee-sting WENT "Where no man had gone before" in an intensly unenjoyable 10 minutes, like riding a bolt of lightening and you can't wait to get off. You sure had a painful ride and no one needs to tell you what hurts, what swells and what itches.

Honestly, I had NO intentions to Scratch that unpleasant Itch.

Hope you are fair skinned and look 20 years younger once the swelling goes away. If it works, just stick your head in next time while someone hammers the box - lol. I'm sure if "your head in a box of bees" makes you look 20 year younger.

Mick, you can open a world wide ALL NATURAL "FACELIFT in a Box" it would be a great product, bee ranchers package a shipping cage of bees includes it with every box that has a whole in it to stick your head. The directions state: after inserting the patients head... Slap the box fast, repeated, hard and on all sides. Count to 30, and carefully remove box. When done - the directions read: leave box outside away from homes for natural release into the wild to rebuild the world bee count! I think this could work

You'd never have to work again Smiley
« Last Edit: November 09, 2009, 11:13:32 AM by beemaster » Logged

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Cindi
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« Reply #16 on: November 09, 2009, 08:42:16 AM »

Bwahhhh (how do you spell laughing the gut out anyways, smiling), oh these funny things in life, oops, shouldn't really laugh about the pain of others, but oops, just can't help it  cheesy cheesy cheesy  rolleyes  Beautiful days, to love and enjoy with great health. Cindi
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There are strange things done in the midnight sun by the men who moil for gold.  The Arctic trails have their secret tales that would make your blood run cold.  The Northern Lights have seen queer sights, but the queerest they ever did see, what the night on the marge of Lake Lebarge, I cremated Sam McGee.  Robert Service
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« Reply #17 on: November 09, 2009, 09:26:12 AM »

Did you, perhaps, find an all-natural method of male-enhancement?  evil  Somehow, I do not see millions of men signing up for the treatment.  Wishing you a speedy recovery.... grin
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Cindi
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« Reply #18 on: November 09, 2009, 09:45:33 AM »

 cheesy cheesy cheesy  Lips Sealed  Oops, smiling, beautiful days, to love and live, share, health.  Cindi
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There are strange things done in the midnight sun by the men who moil for gold.  The Arctic trails have their secret tales that would make your blood run cold.  The Northern Lights have seen queer sights, but the queerest they ever did see, what the night on the marge of Lake Lebarge, I cremated Sam McGee.  Robert Service
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« Reply #19 on: November 09, 2009, 11:22:39 AM »

If you had "GOOD RESULTS" from being stung "There" surely a workerbee would be packaged  with all "protection". But in now way (I don't care how warped you are) is there anything enjoyable or beneficial about that treatment .

Just to explan to those who haven't read before: I was wearing shorts with BOXERS underneigth and a lone worker had gotten on my leg and climbed up, she likely got disoriented and panacked. Honestly, I didn't know she was there until about 2 seconds before being stung - but I remembered her for DAYS.

I went from surreal peaceful to PRETTY ZONED IN ASAP to what just happened.. Getting to the stinger would have been a Youtube Viral Video.
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