A wife and her husband were having a dinner party for all the major status figures in Rome, Italy. The wife was very excited about this and wanted everything to be perfect. At the very last minute, she realized that she didn't have any snails for the dinner party, so she asked her husband to run down to the beach with the bucket she was handing him to gather some snails.
Very grudgingly, he agreed. He took the bucket, walked out the door, down the steps, and out to the beach. As he was collecting the snails, he noticed a beautiful woman strolling alongside the water just a little further down the beach. He kept thinking to himself, wouldn't it be great if she would just come down and talk to me...but he went back to gathering the snails.
All of a sudden, he looked up and the beautiful woman was standing right over him. They got to talking and she invited him back to her place, just down the beach. They were at her apartment and they started messing around. It got so hot and heavy that he was exhausted afterwards and passed out there.
At seven o'clock the next morning, he woke up and exclaimed, "Oh no! My wife's dinner party!" He gathered all his clothes, put them on real fast, grabbed his bucket, and ran out the door.
He ran down the beach, all the way to his condo. He was in such a hurry that when he got to the top of the stairs, he dropped the bucket of snails. There were snails all the way down the stairs!
Just then the door opened, with a very angry wife standing in the doorway wondering where he'd been all this time. He looked at the snails on the steps, then he looked at her, then back at the snails and said, "Come on guys, we're almost there!"