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Author Topic: Highway robbery  (Read 1174 times)

Offline beecanbee

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Highway robbery
« on: September 14, 2009, 08:38:21 PM »
A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work. Her 9-year old son, Johnny, comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch. The woman's husband also comes home. She puts her lover in the closet, not realising that Johnny is in there already.

Johnny says, "Dark in here."
The man says, "Yes, it is."
"I have a baseball," says Johnny.
"That's nice," the man says.
"Want to buy it?" asks Johnny.
"No, thanks."
"My dad's outside," says Johnny.
"OK, how much?" asks the man.
"Sold," says the man.

In the next few weeks, it happens again that Johnny and the lover are in the closet together.

"Dark in here," begins Johnny.
"Yes, it is," says the man.
"I have a Wilson fielders glove."
The lover, remembering the last time, asks Johnny, "How much?"
"$350," replies Johnny.
"Highway robbery. Sold," says the man.

A few days later, the father says to Johnny, "Grab your ball and glove, let's go outside and have a game of catch.  "I can't, I sold my ball and my gloves," says Johnny.

The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?" 

"$500," Johnny replies. "That's terrible to overcharge your friends like that," says his father. "That is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess your greed."

They go to the church and the father makes Johnny sit in the confessional and closes the door.

"Dark in here," begins Johnny.
"Don't start that s&$t again, you're in my closet now," says the priest.
"I come from a state that raises corn and cotton and cockleburs and Democrats, and frothy eloquence neither convinces nor satisfies me. I am from Missouri. You have got to show me."  Duncan Vandiver

A boy can do half the work of a man, but two boys do less, and three boys get nothing done at all. :)

(False) Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel.  - Samuel Johnson

Offline hardwood

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Re: Highway robbery
« Reply #1 on: September 14, 2009, 09:20:11 PM »
Oh that's bad...reeeel bad :-D
"In the first place, we should insist that if the immigrant who comes here in good faith becomes an American and assimilates himself to us, he shall be treated on an exact equality with everyone else, for it is an outrage to discriminate against any such man because of creed, or birthplace, or origin. But this is predicated upon the person's becoming in every facet an American, and nothing but an American...There can be no divided allegiance here. Any man who says he is an American, but something else also, isn't an American at all. We have room for but one flag, the American flag...We have room for but one language here, and that is the English language...And we have room for but one sole loyalty and that is a loyalty to the American people."

Theodore Roosevelt 1907

Offline irerob

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Re: Highway robbery
« Reply #2 on: September 15, 2009, 01:49:46 AM »
roflmao  :lau:
You don't need a parachute to sky dive.... you do how ever need one to sky dive twice.

Offline 1reb

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Re: Highway robbery
« Reply #3 on: September 16, 2009, 09:47:19 AM »