beecanbee
House Bee

Offline
Gender: 
Posts: 294
Location: Kamogawa, Chiba Japan
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« on: September 07, 2009, 07:55:19 PM » |
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A young boy, about 12, answered a knock at the door.
"Is yer paw home?" a farmer asked.
"No sir, he ain't," the boy replied. "He went into town."
"Well," said the farmer, "is yer maw here?"
"No, sir, she ain't here neither. She went into town with pa."
"How about your brother, Howard. Is he here?"
"He went with ma and pa."
The farmer stood there for a minute, shifting from one foot to the other and mumbling to himself.
"Is there anything I can do fer ya?" the boy asked politely. "I knows where all the tools are, if you want to borry one. Or maybe I could take a message fer pa."
"Well," said the farmer uncomfortably, "I really wanted to talk to yer paw. It's about your brother, Howard, getting my daughter, Pearly Mae, pregnant."
The boy considered this for a moment. "You would have to talk to Pa about that", he finally conceded.
"If it helps you any, I know that Pa charges $50 for the bull and $25 for the hog, but I really don't know how much he gets fer Howard."
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Paul “I come from a state that raises corn and cotton and cockleburs and Democrats, and frothy eloquence neither convinces nor satisfies me. I am from Missouri. You have got to show me." Duncan Vandiver A boy can do half the work of a man, but two boys do less, and three boys get nothing done at all.  (False) Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel. - Samuel Johnson
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kathyp
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« Reply #1 on: September 07, 2009, 10:54:09 PM » |
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 can i borrow that one?
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"Nay, it [this constitution of government] must perish, if there be not that vital spirit in the people, which alone can nourish, sustain, and direct all its movements. It is in vain, that statesmen shall form plans of government, in which the beauty and harmony of a republic shall be embodied in visible order, shall be built up on solid substructions, and adorned by every useful ornament, if the inhabitants suffer the silent power of time to dilapidate its walls, or crumble its massy supporters into dust; if the assaults from without are never resisted, and the rottenness and mining from within are never guarded against. Who can preserve the rights and liberties of the people, when they shall be abandoned by themselves? Who shall keep watch in the temple, when the watchmen sleep at their posts? Who shall call upon the people to redeem their possessions, and revive the republic, when their own hands have deliberately and corruptly surrendered them to the oppressor, and have built the prisons, or dug the graves of their own friends?
– Justice Joseph Story, "Commentaries on the Constitution of the United States," Volume II, Chapter XIII: Mode of Passing Laws, Sections 900-901, pp. 364 (1833)
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iddee
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« Reply #2 on: September 07, 2009, 11:05:18 PM » |
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Howard, or the joke? 
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"Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me . . . Anything can happen, child. Anything can be"
*Shel Silverstein*
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kathyp
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« Reply #3 on: September 07, 2009, 11:16:10 PM » |
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the joke. i already have one of the other, and one at a time is enough. you are just full of it today, aren't you? 
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"Nay, it [this constitution of government] must perish, if there be not that vital spirit in the people, which alone can nourish, sustain, and direct all its movements. It is in vain, that statesmen shall form plans of government, in which the beauty and harmony of a republic shall be embodied in visible order, shall be built up on solid substructions, and adorned by every useful ornament, if the inhabitants suffer the silent power of time to dilapidate its walls, or crumble its massy supporters into dust; if the assaults from without are never resisted, and the rottenness and mining from within are never guarded against. Who can preserve the rights and liberties of the people, when they shall be abandoned by themselves? Who shall keep watch in the temple, when the watchmen sleep at their posts? Who shall call upon the people to redeem their possessions, and revive the republic, when their own hands have deliberately and corruptly surrendered them to the oppressor, and have built the prisons, or dug the graves of their own friends?
– Justice Joseph Story, "Commentaries on the Constitution of the United States," Volume II, Chapter XIII: Mode of Passing Laws, Sections 900-901, pp. 364 (1833)
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iddee
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« Reply #4 on: September 07, 2009, 11:23:09 PM » |
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I think I better go to bed before Kathy starts shooting. Good night, all.
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"Listen to the mustn'ts, child. Listen to the don'ts. Listen to the shouldn'ts, the impossibles, the won'ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me . . . Anything can happen, child. Anything can be"
*Shel Silverstein*
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1reb
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« Reply #5 on: September 08, 2009, 09:19:21 AM » |
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