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Beemaster's International Beekeeping Forums > MEMBER & GUEST INTERACTION SECTION > HUMOR is a FUNNY THING > Proofreading is a dying art, wouldn't you say?

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Author Topic: Proofreading is a dying art, wouldn't you say?  (Read 3062 times)
kathyp
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« on: March 19, 2009, 11:07:15 AM »

Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter


This one caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and a call was made to the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction the next day.

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Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
No, really? Ya think?

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Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that's taking things a bit far!

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Miners Refuse to Work after Death
'good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's!

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Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works any better than a fair trial!

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War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect!

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If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Ya think?!

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Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought!

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Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
They may be on to something!

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Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?

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Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
He probably IS the battery charge!

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New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Weren't they fat enough?!

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Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
That's what he gets for eating those beans!

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Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Do they taste like chicken?

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Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Chainsaw Massacre all over again!

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Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall!

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And the winner is....

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Did I read that right?

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"Nay, it [this constitution of government] must perish, if there be not that vital spirit in the people, which alone can nourish, sustain, and direct all its movements. It is in vain, that statesmen shall form plans of government, in which the beauty and harmony of a republic shall be embodied in visible order, shall be built up on solid substructions, and adorned by every useful ornament, if the inhabitants suffer the silent power of time to dilapidate its walls, or crumble its massy supporters into dust; if the assaults from without are never resisted, and the rottenness and mining from within are never guarded against. Who can preserve the rights and liberties of the people, when they shall be abandoned by themselves? Who shall keep watch in the temple, when the watchmen sleep at their posts? Who shall call upon the people to redeem their possessions, and revive the republic, when their own hands have deliberately and corruptly surrendered them to the oppressor, and have built the prisons, or dug the graves of their own friends?

– Justice Joseph Story, "Commentaries on the Constitution of the United States," Volume II, Chapter XIII: Mode of Passing Laws, Sections 900-901, pp. 364 (1833)
Keith13
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« Reply #1 on: March 19, 2009, 04:35:04 PM »
Love em keep em coming

Keith
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Brian D. Bray
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« Reply #2 on: March 20, 2009, 12:03:36 AM »
Crushed Truck flips over Convertible

true love?
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Collision between Bicycle and Deer, taken to hospital.

What about the bike rider?
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Police taking aim at hundreds of stray animals

The Pound must be full.
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Don't ya just love small town newspapers?
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Life is a school.  What have you learned?   Brian      The greatest danger to our society is apathy, vote in every election!
Jerrymac
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« Reply #3 on: March 20, 2009, 12:14:27 AM »
Mexico nabs suspected cartel leader without a shot
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rainbow sunflower  Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.   rainbow sunflower

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Jerrymac
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« Reply #4 on: April 01, 2009, 01:05:21 AM »
When Did April Fool's Day Begin?

I thought it started at midnight  huh
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rainbow sunflower  Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.   rainbow sunflower

 Jerry

My pictures.Type in password;  youview
     http://photobucket.com/albums/v225/Jerry-mac/
Jerrymac
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« Reply #5 on: April 21, 2009, 04:53:29 PM »
Another one I saw today;

New ancient Egypt temples discovered in Sinai

How new is ancient?
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rainbow sunflower  Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.   rainbow sunflower

 Jerry

My pictures.Type in password;  youview
     http://photobucket.com/albums/v225/Jerry-mac/
eri
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« Reply #6 on: April 21, 2009, 05:45:12 PM »
I enjoyed this little Freudian slip of a typo, in an e-mail message from the 2012 Draft Sarah Committee:

“Governor Palin represents so many everyday average working people. She shares our conservative values and is our standard barrier [sic]. That is why I am so passionate about our work and cause here at the 2012 Draft Sarah Committee.”
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On Pleasure
Kahlil Gibran
....
And to both, bee and flower, the giving and the receiving of pleasure is a need and an ecstasy.
People of Orphalese, be in your pleasures like the flowers and the bees.
Brian D. Bray
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« Reply #7 on: April 22, 2009, 02:18:56 AM »
Quote from: Jerrymac on April 21, 2009, 04:53:29 PM
Another one I saw today;

New ancient Egypt temples discovered in Sinai

How new is ancient?

Ancient is more recent than Fossilized, if that's any help.  How about this one:  New Dinasour fossils found in Montana.
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Life is a school.  What have you learned?   Brian      The greatest danger to our society is apathy, vote in every election!
dragonfly
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« Reply #8 on: April 28, 2009, 01:09:57 PM »
Hah! grin
Those are great!
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